There are certain relationships in our lives that are so important and refreshing that not having them can make one’s life boring. Having close friends is not only cool but also important for our overall well-being. However, to have friends is one thing and to make friends is another. As we age, connecting meaningfully with strangers can get intimidating for some people.
As kids, we just made friends naturally. Today, even having a casual chat with strangers can shoot up our anxiety. As the key to most things in life, it is the confidence that you need to pursue new people and foster good friendships. If you have been trying to make friends but lack confidence, here are 4 realistic tips that will help you gel with new people easily.
- First Step: Look Inward
Most of the time, we are afraid of approaching new people because of our inner critic. We have a voice in our head saying we’ll mess up or it will be awkward. To be confident with people, you need to learn to deal with that inner critic. Acknowledge it and come up with ways that can help you ignore its constant bickering. Maybe complimenting yourself in the mirror or loudly affirming your best characteristics can help you feel confident before speaking to a new person.
- Find Common Interests
If you look at your present friends network or the one from your school or college days and inspect what helped you really bond with them, you may find out that you had shared common interests with them. A lot of friendships start this way. To find out common interests, you have to ask questions. It can be as simple as ‘Which shows are you watching these days?’ or you can start with a compliment, ‘Nice purse! Where’d you get it from? I buy mine from the XYZ brand,’ and so on.
- Focus On Body Language
People don’t realise that to make friends, you don’t just need to be confident in your speech but also confident in your body language. Not just confident, but also approachable and friendly. The best and most classic advice is to smile. A smile can make people more comfortable around you and avoid awkward silences. A good eye contact also shows confidence and that you are interested in talking to this person.
- Listen More, Talk Less
Everyone has a different way of bonding. Some bond by acts of service, some bond by buying gifts for women or male friends, while others bond by talking endlessly. Each person is different, but there is one thing common among us all: we just want to be heard. So, if you are worried too much about saying the right thing, instead, focus on being a good, patient listener. Sometimes, creating a safe space for people to talk is what leads to meaningful friendships that last for years.
After going through these tips, finding your new ‘दोस्त’ or ‘yaar’ doesn’t seem too intimidating, right? Humans are natural at building relationships and forming a community. So, don’t be too afraid, be your best self and follow these tips to find your new best friend(s)!